Lasts and Firsts

It's been a sad, mad, crazy, glad weekend. Our last child, Matthew, graduated from Rockhurst University. All of our kids had the advantage of a LaSallian education in high school and a Jesuit education in college. I always tell people....it's the best combination...Lasallians for your heart...Jesuits for your head. It was my last OHS graduation as a teacher and administrator and I'm not afraid to say that I cried more than once today. Looking back over my 31 years at OHara...it's been a life shaping, life enriching, terrific journey. I've worked with the best people anywhere...Jane, my partner and compatriot; John, my student, my colleague, my boss; Walter, an inspirational leader who always saw the big picture and Stuart who always remembered the little things; Larry, an authentic gentleman in an age that's forgotten what that means and a loyal, compassionate friend; Margaret whose passion for education is still inspiring. Melissa, the rookie who grew into a terrific teacher and represents all that is good about OHara; Mary, whose passion for OHS enriches our students; Bob, my social studies sidekick; Pete Williams, still one of the most intelligent, compassionate women that I know; Lori,the younger sister I never had; Debbie, still one of my closest friends, Denise, whose honesty and friendship never fail; Lisa,who for years has kept me organized with love and affection; George, whose LaSallian spirit is an example for all of us; Br. Chuck. Br. Richard, Br. Chris, who taught me what it means to be LaSallian; Nancy and Steve, whose dedication knows no bounds; Kathy Duggan, whose passion for life inspires me; Anne Roth, who invited me to be a part of her family and for which I am forever grateful; Terry Downs who shared not one but two jobs with me; Jerry and Cathy Meyer who taught me more about courage and faith than I could learn in a lifetime... And there are so many others...I know I've forgotten several people who touched my heart and life...and those who are gone but not forgotten..Anne Hennon, Marge Wempe, Jimmy Johnson, Marvin Tucker. And students...so many terrific kids who have grown into compassionate, faithful men and women, some with families of their own. I hope I played some small role in their learning and faith journey; they certainly taught me so many lessons...the importance of community and faith...the values of zeal, patience, persistence and determination....the joy in victory and sadness in defeat...the humility in success and the determination in failure...OHara helped me raise my kids, nurtured my soul, grounded my faith and made work truly a labor of love.

Things we might be able to live without

For no particular reason, I started thinking today about things the world could easily do without...stuff that we just don't need, stuff that adds no beauty or grace or peace to our troubled planet. So, what are these things we can live without? Tattoos for starters. Really? Who needs a tattoo? They are expensive and painful and although there are some tattoo artists who are truly gifted, wouldn't they be better serving the community if they painted church windows or billboards or almost any other thing? Aspartame. Seriously. My best friend's science students tell me it's awful stuff. It causes headaches and maybe cancer. Diet Soda drinkers...try water. Chihuahuas. I love dogs. I do. And my Maltese is the epitome of a high strung barking dog. But chihuahuas? They are ugly and mean. And, so, what else? Mosquitos. Except as food for hungry purple martins, what good are they? Maybe they're God's way of reminding us that He's in charge, but seriously. They spread disease. And are annoying. Breast implants. Really. Seriously. The world does not need them. Women are beautiful...with small boobs or large. Stop trying to fix what's not wrong. Let's let plastic surgeons worry about cleft palettes and burn victims. Cup A. Rejoice.

Random Thoughts

It's St. Patrick's Day, 2015, and my birthday is tomorrow. I cannot believe that I will be 60, provided I make it through tonight. As I have gotten older, especially these last few months, I've been thinking so much more about my parents. These memories are bittersweet, of course. I'm also on spring break and it's been a relaxing one so far. I had an interview yesterday at St. John LeLande, which I think went well and presents challenges and questions. For some reason, I was researching mixing bowls this evening and discovered a set I want to order. I love to cook but hate the mess, interestingly. But, these bowls reminded me of my mom. My current set is one that my mom bought for me and, of course, that made me miss her even more. And, it is a reminder that I have to get my shingles shot, which I promised my mom I would do when I turned 60. Of course, I would rather be shot than go to the doctor weighing so much...more work to do! I guess that's the point...life is always there, presenting us with challenges and questions. Embrace it and move forward! Here's to the next 60. :)

Reflection on Loss

We received word today that the brother of a student was murdered in Kansas City, Kansas. Few of the details are known, but it made me think. There are at least three of our current students who have lost a loved one to violence. One of our assistant principal's nieces was murdered many years ago in a small town in Kansas and my sister-in-law was killed by her husband. That's a lot of violence and I teach in a small (300 student) Catholic high school in the midwest. What are other families and schools enduring in other areas? Violence is not confined to inner city streets or rural midwestern small towns. All of us are affected by violence. How can we reduce reliance on violence as a solution to our problems? I grew up in a gun owning household where my dad owned guns of every size and type. A part-time deputy sheriff for Miller County, he had a gun that he routinely carried when he worked that job. He was a bird hunter and had a few shotguns. My brothers grew up learning to shoot but I didn't care that much about it. My sister-in-law is a gun owner and both of my brothers have collections. So I am not anti-gun. But. I do believe that easy access to weapons has made it much easier to solve disputes with violence. And, I don't just blame easy access to guns for the rampant violence that threatens my security and santiy. Video games glorify violence as do too many of the songs and artists that our young people admire. The lack of social service support for segments of our population leads to an uptick in the number of domestic assaults. The free and open internet makes violent images instantly available. We routinely (it seems) watch henious violent acts against journalists, soldiers, and others by terrorist groups in the Mideast and elsewhere. I wish I had an easier answer. I wish it troubled more people that images of violence and stories of loss make up much of the day to day reality for hundreds and thousands of people. Simply turning off the television or turning away doesn't solve the problem. Our leaders grapple with so many tough societal issues. Solving these issues will take determination, sacrifice, commitment. We cannot leave our children their children a legacy of violence. Too much is at stake.

Things I've Learned at the AP US History Reading

For those of you who are "unfamiliar" with the world of AP, I am currently in Louisville at the AP US History Reading which means that I have joined 1400 of my closest friends to read about 1.4 million U.S. history exams. It was a spur of the moment decision since they only called me on Wednesday of last week. I have always wanted to attend so that I could learn more about how to help my students do well on the exam and now I am here. So I have learned (so far) 1. That I really, really, really miss my family 2. That I will never again complain about grading my students' essays. Today, alone, I've graded 200 exams. ARGH. 3. That I cannot sleep in a bed (I need my recliner) 4. That no matter how bad my students write, they write 10x better than any essay I've read so far. 5. That this experience is something I should probably only do once. 6. That AP US History teachers are a terrific group of people, passionate about their subject and their students. 7. That Louisville is an awesome city with lots to see and do and that I don't really want to see any of it or do any of it. 8. That my family can survive just fine without me (for a while). 9. That having a roommate is not as much fun as it was in college (although she's really nice) 10. That I need to walk more. 11. That feeding 2000 teachers requires food that is not necessarily delicious (although it's filling). 12. That AP teachers really, really enjoy the cocktail reception. 13. That AP US History is being "resigned" and that we better teach our students to WRITE, WRITE, WRITE. 14. That I love my hometown of KC. 15. That reading student papers for 8 hours a day is NO FUN. 16. That I likely have ADD as I cannot sit still.

Memorial Day, My Mom, Facebook, Daughters, and other thoughts

I have always loved Memorial Day, maybe a little less now than I did as a girl. As a young girl, I accompanied my grandmother and dad as they took flowers to the cemetery for what grandma called, "Decoration Day." Sometmies, we had as many as thirty containers of flowers, mostly fresh picked and kept in the refrigerator. Grandma had these white cardboard containers that she would fill with irises and peonies, keeping them in the refrigerator if they bloomed early. I have tried to keep up the tradition in greatly reduced fashion. I went to Tuscumbia on Saturday and in the pouring rain put flowers at Grandma and Grandpa Wright's graves, my mom and dad, my dad's baby sister who died in 1919, the same year that he was born, Uncle Bob Marshall and Homer Clay. I met Connie at the cemetery and we had a great lunch at Eldon, enjoying catching up on our lives. She's been my best friend for as long as I can remember and when I see her it's as though we haven't been separated for weeks or months or years but days. As for the rest of the weekend, it was all right. The girls have been fighting and that always upsets me. However, as I knew they would, they made up over pizza and beer. Every time they fight, I despair thinking that somehow I did something wrong, treating one differently than the other; and, every time they make up, I relax, thinkig that maybe I did everything all right after all. I have thought a lot about my mom this weekend, too. She died six years ago yesterday, May 25th. In some ways, it seems like it was just yesterday...and in others, it feels as though it happened eons ago. I think of her often. Mostly, I wish that I had been closer as she grew older. We talked almost every day but in some ways she remains an engima. She was a private person, exceptionally so as I reflect back now, and I realize now that there was a LOT I didn't understand about her. I think I'm a little more transparent, more like my Aunt Betty, perhaps. As I grow older, my fondest hope is that my girls fall in love and live in Kansas City so I can be there for them everyday...going to the kids' soccer games, celebrating every birthday and school play.

I love this quote from NCIS.

I love this quote from NCIS. It's one of my favorite episodes, featuring McGee, Gibbs, Vance, and the North Korean agent Khi. "Anyone can achieve their fullest potential. Who we are might be predetermined, but the path we follow is always of our own choosing. We should never allow our fears or the expectations of other to set the frontiers of our destiny. Your destiny can't be changed, but it can be challenged. Everyman is born as many men, and dies as a single one."